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Gossip

weather: cloudy
outside: 16°C
mood: pensive
Gossip is very hard to define sometimes. You can discuss it to death, give ninety-million examples with ninety-million and one exceptions, but it's still nebulous at best. And that's if you're careful and didn't open the Etiquette can of worms.

My first instinct is to say that I don't like gossip and I won't participate in it. But what's the difference, then, between gossip, idle chit-chat, news and plain (even necessary) discussion? Is it the positive or negative quality of the comments? Is it the level of truth of the assumptions and statements made? Is it the importance or necessity of knowing? "Sure, but not really..." to all three.

I have a mild disdain for journalism precisely because I think there's a blurry gap between journalism and gossip. Some sources land closer to one side than the other, but I really don't trust any news source on its own.

I grew up in a small, very close family of three (then four, when my brother was born). I was always taught that any speculation I had about other people was not to be shared outside of my immediate family. Lately, some of it has morphed into no sharing beyond my husband.

My husband's family is the opposite. If someone knows something, everyone knows. Inside of an hour. With all kinds of embellishments. I've been bitten in the ass and I've put up my walls. Still, there's only so much I can do, living in the same house as them.

Whenever my Mother-In-Law starts talking to me about Uncle So&so being pissed at Cousin Such&such doing whatever or some such, I giggle and tell her, "I have no idea, I'm always the last to know anything." Which isn't always true; I do know, I just don't like conversing about it.

Generally, my attitude is: it stops with me. If no one is in danger by not knowing or it's not vital to completing a task, then it doesn't go past me. I am a known Chain Letter Breaker and I can't stand that stupid whispering game.

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Comments

( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
pjammer
Sep. 24th, 2003 09:47 pm (UTC)
Then I can trust you to keep this a secret ...
Man, I need to tell you about that horrible wench aliasa and the things she did when i was in NYC ...

;) ;) ;)
bride
Sep. 24th, 2003 11:34 pm (UTC)
Re: Then I can trust you to keep this a secret ...
O_o ... Incorrigible =)
magicwoman
Sep. 25th, 2003 11:55 am (UTC)
I agree with you.
I'm not a gossip. Never have been. Don't listen to gossip. Usually the very last to know - or if I do know something - I don't know that I know something - you know?

But I agree with your philosophy - It stops with me. Let peace reign.
bride
Sep. 26th, 2003 01:19 pm (UTC)
Re: I agree with you.
Usually the very last to know - or if I do know something - I don't know that I know something - you know?

Hehehe, yeah, I know =)
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )

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eLouai
bride
The Bride of the First House

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