The Bride of the First House (bride) wrote,
The Bride of the First House

Money Ponderings

I'm always appalled at how careless some people seem to be with their spending.

A little background on me: I'm a Software Developer. I make a decent salary, it's not top of the scale S/W Dev salary either (I can get way more if I really were after the money), but it's decent. I don't like to go to the bottom of every paycheque, but I have to right now because of the wedding. This is a 250-300 guest wedding that Will and I are paying for ourselves. We've gotten some amazing deals, so that's helped keep costs down tremendously. So far, the credit card bills are still paid in full every month.

Even now, I get gloomy/bummed/depressed/panicked just before payday because my total net balance is next to $0. I've actually found that I become that way even when I only have a few hundred left in each account. I go completely psycho inside if I'm carrying an overdue credit card balance. Nothing I haven't learned to deal with on the outside, but the feeling is still there. It's the way I was raised and taught.

And "the more I think, the less I make". The more I try to budget and plan, the more I feel like I don't even have enough money to breathe.

Getting back to the "appalled at other people" part. I've recently heard about someone I used to know filing bankrupcy and everyone was saying how they couldn't understand why. I'm glad I don't hang around that crowd much anymore.

It really doesn't make sense how someone can manage on a salary that's a third of mine (or less because EI can't be that much for highschool dropouts who used to work part-time flipping burgers), have 5 children and pregnant, go to two or three movies every single week, have extended cable (or whatever it is that gives you 5000 channels), eat out almost every day with the kids, go for coffee at Starbuck's with friends every day, take all the kids to Disneyland four times a year, buying Collector's Edition Barbie dolls that go for $100+ each and other collector's items that cost way more than they're worth...

I dunno... I saw the bankrupcy thing coming 5 years ago, when I met her.


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